All aboard the Bruise Cruise with Quintron, Miss Pussycat and others

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Unfortunately for you, the Bruise Cruise — helmed by cruise director Ian Svenonius, with Quintron and Miss Pussycat, the Black Lips, Vivian Girls, the Strange Boys, Ty Segall and others on a Bahamanian adventure cruise from Feb. 25-28 — just sold out.

Four hundred passengers will sail from Miami to Nassau for a 'round-the-clock boat party with seven concerts. (Not to be confused with the Jam Cruise, which held its ninth voyage last month.) Here's what life's like aboard the Carnival cruiseliner:

Upon arrival, attendees will be greeted with a bottle of wine in their private cabin and creative towel animals will be waiting for “Bruisers” when they return to their rooms each night. Dine with your friends and new cruise acquaintances while enjoying another complimentary bottle of wine at one of your dinners. Still hungry? Room service is free and available 24 hours a day: Turkey, Roast-Beef, BLT sandwiches, you name it. Pack your finest threads and don them in the delectable dining halls, dance the night away, and then indulge in the all day/all night, on-the-house ice cream machine.

Exhausted with sunbathing on the ship? There will be a full day spent in Nassau, Bahamas during which attendees can explore the island on their own, take part in guided excursions, and even swim with dolphins. On the island, a huge water park at the Atlantis resort is ready to thrill Bruisers with vertical drops and tunnels right through a live shark tank! Bruise Cruise will be announcing a series of events that will occur in Nassau, including the big island party concert at Señor Frog’s, which will feature Bruise Cruise bands and conclude with New York Night Train’s Soul Clap and Dance-Off. A limbo contest might also make a guest appearance. ...

The cruise will include multiple concerts at sea, open-bar cocktail hours, a soul dance-off with cash prizes, and a Puppetry and Pancakes breakfast show with Miss Pussycat. Amenities featured on board include: Gambling, resort-style pools, miniature golf, water parks, spas, fine dining, and more.

Here's Miss P's promo video:

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