Ted + Britney = Forever?

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Austin-based singer/songwriter Ted Hadji performs at the Circle Bar tonight. But will his biggest fan, his “wife,” be in attendance?

In May, Hadji self-released his debut album The Particles Don’t Care, full of raw sounds and lyrics. Samples are posted on his MySpace page. But there also is a link to an “official” site that is operated by a 15-year-old girl who claims to be married to Hadji.

 

 

The girl, “Britney” or “Brittany” as it is sometimes written, claims not only to be Hadji’s number one fan, but also his girlfriend and wife — simultaneously. She boasts that the two fell in love while Hadji was sitting in front of a bar and said to her, back when she was 13: “Don’t be a musician kid. Whatever you do, don’t be a musician. I love you too much for that.”

 

This was confirmation to “Britney” that, of course, she and Hadji had forged an undeniable connection. But to her mother, Hadji was nothing more than a crazy man on a stoop. To this, “Britney” describes her mother as “a cold, shriveled woman who is ugly!” and later says her “womb is a toxic wasteland drenched in puke!” After a few more profanities and insults, “Britney” goes on to talk about how much she loves Hadji’s music and provides tips on the best ways to stalk him. She even boasts that while Hadji only printed 1,000 packaged CDs, she bought them all. That’s right, every single one of them, and she wants you to buy them from her if you’re a true fan. Get them while they’re hot; she’s selling them for a mere $11.99 a pop.

 

If this is an elaborate prank on Hadji’s side, kudos to him for keeping the world guessing. No doubt if he has this much creativity for a fake fansite, his music and his stage show must be of epic proportions.

 

Or, maybe there really is some girl out there named “Britney” or “Brittany” who just keeps forgetting how to spell her name and who likes mini horses, Hot Topic and absolutely adores Hadji. - Briana Prevost

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